I just feel.

Why do I feel like junk after such a great weekend. I realy should be doing my education homework that is due tomorrow, but I really don't feel like it. I took a drive out to Walmart for some needed cereal, and then took the long way home. I wish I had a driving buddy, but they are all in bed, or off in another city right now. It felt good to get off of campus, and go fast, wind in hair, not a soul around. But it hurts me to feel the way I do right now. It is almost like I don't know what to say or what to do and I certainly don't understand why. I just feel.

and it goes a little something like this...

This past weekend was breathtaking. I am so amazed by what God did in my life and the lives of so many others! The whole weekend was such a refilling experience, being connected with other Christians who all were working on their walk. But Saturday night was really something. At the end of Dave's talk, he opened the mic for people to come up and be able to confess the things the Lord had put on their heart. At first it was silent, not one person was moving towards the stage. Dave was about to stand up again, and bring up the worship band, when Katie stood up and started confessing. What she started spurred more people to come, which continued to build greater and greater. After each person would pour out their hearts, Dave would talk with them a little bit on stage, and then he would ask for others to come pray with the person who had just confessed. It was absolutely incredible to see and feel the fellowship of 200 believers taking in and comforting their brothers and sisters. We eventually split up into women and men groups, where we continued the confessing and praying until late into the night. It was so eye opening to see how many women had been scared and hurt by men in their life, deep cuts. Being able to pray with these women really engraved a deep meaning onto my life. I have always been wondering what God has in store for me in my life, the "future." As I sat there with one of the woman, I just saw how much God was working and how he was using each of us there to protect and build up His children. I really feel like He is calling me to grasp that more, and possible do it as a "job" (bad word for it) one day. There is just so much feeling right now that I don't know what to do with it.

Now being home, it is hard to keep my sponge soaked. The devil certainly is at work here on campus trying to undo everything we learned and felt this weekend. I fear for my friends when I see them so down that my words aren’t a comfort to them. It scares me that we can trip into believing that God isn’t at work in everything we do. It scares me to see my friends in pain, struggling to find meaning in their business. I have hope and faith that the Lord will deliver us from all of this, but when?!?! Is it just that we don’t see His blessings, or that we are being patient??? "’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’" Jeremiah 29:11

Correction

I have to apologize, because I made a mistake in my last blog entry. Terra does come visit me.

Been awhile...

So it has been over a month since I have last written in this thing. Not really sure if anyone still checks it, but hey to all of you faithful fans still hoping this girl would update you all! Life has really been crazy; I am kind of surprised I am still sittin' here to tell the tale. It has been a super trying semester for me. One I was expecting, but not wanting to really get. School is hard. And I do me HARD! To make it worse, I have to watch other succeed while I stumble and pick up my F. This just isn't fun.

On the flip side, my girls and one boy in my LC are awesome! They make me laugh, cry, and even hurt once in awhile. Many of them are even Christians! Such a cool thing to see and it just makes me so excited to see why God placed me on the floor this year with these people.

Tonight was "Trucker Night" at the AO Truck Stop. Good Times were had by all.

My friends, ehhemm, family here are just so dear to me. They are really what is keeping me from splitting apart. I just love them all(you all) so much! I am just want to give a huge thanks to you, because I really don't think MSU could be the same without you and I know my life definitely would be a lot different at the moment if I never meet you all; not sure you all really truly know that one! God has surely blessed me with each of your smiling faces and warm hearts! And so now it is 1:37 in the morning. And I miss you guys even though I'm probably like 100 feet for you all. I wish I could see you more, and be able to hang out. But that really doesn't happen that much with me. Wether it is having the time or just the effort to walk over to where you guys are (no one ever comes here), I just don't see much of you all. Well, my bed is calling my name and that is where I need to be. A demain et bon nuit!